We all have seen or heard these before but it brings a smile to review them once again. If you are reading this e-mail than you must have kept them in mind in your earlier years! Enjoy!

Aviation Axioms

  1. No matter what else happens, fly the airplane. Forget all that stuff about thrust and drag, lift and gravity.
  2. It's better to be down here wishing you were up there, than up there wishing you were down here.
  3. If you're ever faced with a forced landing at night, turn on the landing lights to see the landing area. If you don't like what you see, turn' em back off.
  4. A check ride ought to be like a skirt, short enough to be interesting but still be long enough to cover everything.
  5. Speed is life, altitude is life insurance. No one has ever collided with the sky!
  6. Always remember you fly an airplane with your head, not your hands.
  7. Never let an airplane take you somewhere your brain didn't get to five minutes earlier.
  8. "Unskilled" pilots are always found in the wreckage with their hand around the microphone.
  9. If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger; if you pull the stick back, they get smaller. (Unless you keep pulling the stick back-then they get bigger again.)
  10. Hovering is for pilots who love to fly but have no place to go.
  11. The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.
  12. Flying is the second greatest thrill known to man. Landing is the first!
  13. Everyone already knows the definition of a 'good' landing is one from which you can walk away. But very few know the definition of a 'great' landing. It's one after which you can use the airplane another time.
  14. The probability of survival is equal to the angle of arrival.
  15. IFR: I Follow Roads.
  16. A Marine knows he’s landed with the wheels up when it takes full power to taxi.
  17. Those who hoot with the owls by night should not fly with the eagles by day.
  18. A helicopter is a collection of rotating parts going round and round and reciprocating parts going up and down—all of them trying to become random in motion.
  19. Helicopters can't really fly—they're just so ugly that the earth immediately repels them.
  20. Pilots believe in clean living. They never drink from a dirty glass.
  21. Things which do you no good in aviation: Altitude above you. Runway behind you. Fuel in the truck. Half a second ago. Approach plates in the car. The airspeed you don't have.
  22. Flying is not dangerous; crashing is dangerous.
  23. A good simulator check ride is like successful surgery on a corpse.
  24. Asking what a pilot thinks about the FAA is like asking a tree what it thinks about dogs.
  25. An airplane may disappoint a good pilot, but it won't surprise him.
  26. Good judgment comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgment.
  27. There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.
  28. It's best to keep the pointed end going forward as much as possible.
  29. Any attempt to stretch fuel is guaranteed to increase headwind.
  30. A thunderstorm is never as bad on the inside as it appears on the outside. It's worse.
  31. A pilot is a confused soul who talks about women when he's flying, and about flying when he's with a woman.
  32. The last thing an Air Force pilot does before leaving the aircraft after making a gear up landing is to put the gear selection lever in the 'down' position.
  33. Try to keep the number of your landings equal to the number of your takeoffs.
  34. Takeoffs are optional. Landings are mandatory.
  35. You cannot propel yourself forward by patting yourself on the back.
  36. Be wary when someone says, "Let me show you something"
  37. If an airplane crashes and doesn't catch fire it is usually out of gas.
  38. Flying at night improves your hearing, that explains night noises.
  39. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.
  40. Keep looking around; there's always something you've missed.
  41. You can't rewrite the laws of aerodynamics.
  42. There are old pilots, and there are bold pilots, but there are no old, bold, pilots!
  43. The propeller is just a big fan in the front of the plane to keep the pilot cool. Want proof? Make it stop; then watch the pilot break out into a sweat.
  44. Flying is the perfect vocation for a man who wants to feel like a boy, but not for one who still is.
  45. If something doesn't seem right it probably isn't.
  46. The difference between a fighter pilot and a pig? A pig doesn't sit at a bar until 0300 waiting to pick up a fighter pilot.

This page created and maintained by Dave Palmer

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